Queer Identity

Now, you already know my name and age so I won't bother with those. What I do want to speak about is asexuality, falling under the trans umbrella, pronouns, and the whole lot.

I knew I was asexual from a very young age. There's this general belief that you can't know your sexuality so young, but I will always beg to differ on that. Most teens begin having sexual awakenings when they're 10-14. For me, there was nothing. I didn't know that I was supposed to be going crazy with hormones and desires and lusting after other students. I truly believed that the rest of the world was like me. Never really thinking about sex, or masturbation, or anything like that at all. When I was younger, I confused asexuality for aromanticism because I had believed that everyone was inherently asexual. That when people said they were "bisexual", they meant they were attracted to both genders but in a strictly romantic way. Sex never came into the equation in my mind. Later, when I was around 17-18, I began to question myself a lot more. I was obsessed with The Magnus Archives, which features an asexual main character, Jon, so I was reading lots of fanfic (my mind loves to indulge once I become obsessed with a story). In one such fanfic, Martin, Jon's boyfriend, mentions needing a wank. I had never felt that way. It was this, embarrasingly, that made me begin to question. Questioning led to research led to experimentation led to me officially identifying as asexual in the way I meant it when I was younger. And I am proud of this fact. I am proud that I am who I am. I don't need to change. I can still love people in my own way. People can love me back. There are a thousand other aces out there as well.

Now, onto the subject of the transgender umbrella. This may be a shock to the readers, but my legal government name is not Bryony! I know. Shocker! I also don't use the same pronouns in real life either! Most people use she/her! Which is something I hope to change with my friends, but alas, we'll see. Anyway, I also knew on some level that I wasn't strictly a girl. I don't really feel like one. I feel like me. I feel more like a boy than I do a girl, honestly. Which is a whole other thing that I'm shelving for later. All this aside, I use they/them and he/him pronouns now. My name is Bryony. I fall under the transgender umbrella. I'm silently proud about that.

Now, here are some resources, websites mostly, in case the reader is questioning, struggling, or researching.